Scurrilous Ephemera Oct. 5 2009 – House of Lohan

– by Stephanie MacDonald

When your fashion house is struggling with branding problems, financial issues and the kind of tawdry design that suggests Middle American mall more than Milan or Manhattan, obviously the first person you should run to for rescue is Lindsay Lohan. No, maybe actually you wouldn’t, but the house of Emanuel Ungaro did for some reason. Really, Ungaro?

Not to add to the trash being piled upon the hapless starlet, spray-tan magnate and leggings-as-pants enthusiast, but this is hardly rocket science: when your new creative advisor is more famous for not wearing things (panties, for instance), you might want to reconsider. Lindsay’s had a rough time lately, being dumped by her girlfriend, going in and out of rehab, having a horrible family of fame whores riding her coattails, having weird things injected into her face that make her look like a Texan trophy-wife; unfortunately it doesn’t look like this collection is going to sweep her into fashion respectability. Featuring glittery heart-shaped pasties, bandeau bikini tops as outerwear and a number of authentically cute (short-short) party dresses, Women’s Wear Daily nevertheless declared the collection “embarrassing.” Next up for Ungaro: The Jenna Jameson & Mischa Barton collection!